Sportly Graces

(or The Commandments on the Field)

by Lord Kirk Dragomani, Provost, Ad’E

  1. Thou shalt salute thy opponent. This gives thou the first indication if he is in range or not.
  2. Thou shalt heed the words of the marshal. His stick is bigger and longer than thine.
  3. Thou shalt heed the words of the herald. This way thou knowest who to look up after the match for butchering thy name.
  4. Thou shalt acknowledge all blows. Acknowledgements include the following calls; “light, slap, flat,” and the ever useful; “nuttin’ on it.”
  5. Thou shalt strive for a fair fight. Particuarly anytime thou can’t get the odds on thy side.
  6. Thou shalt strive for chivalry. This can get thou more brownie points than actually winning the fight.
  7. Thou shalt not bash thy opponent whilst he lieth on the ground. For this does not look good, and wastes energy thou wilt need for the next round.
  8. Thou shalt treat the chiurgeons and waterbearers kindly. For they have the essence of drink and band aids which thou might strongly desire one day.
  9. Thou shalt honor thy lady (or lord). For they have the ability to put Ben Gay on the spots thy cannot reach.
  10. Thou shalt remember that this is a game, and the most rewarding game to stalk are the ones wearing yellow and white scarves.